Sunday, January 15, 2012

Don't try to fast-forward

This is the thing: When you hit 28 or 30, everything begins to divide. You can see very clearly two kinds of people. On one side, people who have used their 20s to learn and grow, to find … themselves and their dreams, people who know what works and what doesn’t, who have pushed through to become real live adults. Then there’s the other kind, who are hanging onto college, or high school even, with all their might. They’ve stayed in jobs they hate, because they’re too scared to get another one. They’ve stayed with men or women who are good but not great, because they don’t want to be lonely. … they mean to develop intimate friendships, they mean to stop drinking like life is one big frat party. But they don’t do those things, so they live in an extended adolescence, no closer to adulthood than when they graduated.

Don’t be like that. Don’t get stuck. Move, travel, take a class, take a risk. There is a season for wildness and a season for settledness, and this is neither. This season is about becoming. Don’t lose yourself at happy hour, but don’t lose yourself on the corporate ladder either. Stop every once in a while and go out to coffee or climb in bed with your journal.

Ask yourself some good questions like: “Am I proud of the life I’m living? What have I tried this month? … Do the people I’m spending time with give me life, or make me feel small? Is there any brokenness in my life that’s keeping me from moving forward?”

Now is your time. Walk closely with people you love, and with people who believe … life is a grand adventure. Don’t get stuck in the past, and don’t try to fast-forward yourself into a future you haven’t yet earned. Give today all the love and intensity and courage you can, and keep traveling honestly along life’s path.

Something amazing happened today. Besides actually doing my French homework rather than avoiding it and watching almost an entire season of United States of Tara. I downloaded and printed out the first of about 9 grad school applications. Sure they aren't due for about about 10 months and no, it's not trying to fast-forward. It's getting mentally prepared by giving myself plenty of time to potentially freak out about the prospect of uprooting my entire life and moving across the country.


Where will the next year take me and does anyone have any suggestions on how to go about moving from Florida to unknown-state-at-least-500-miles-away?


Samantha said...

i loved that! so true too. that's awesome about grad school! such a cool opportunity

Kate said...

This is so inpiring! I just tweeted this post, it was just what I needed this morning! Thanks!

Anonymous said...

Thank you for this post! I especially love the part you bolded. Very applicable to my life right now! Good luck with the grad school applications. I can't speak for myself, because I haven't gone to grad school, but my husband made the leap this fall for grad school. We moved from Salt Lake City to Tallinn, Estonia! Talk about a change for the two of us! All I can say, is that what seems difficult and complicated about leaving is completely worth it once you make the leap.

Magical Day Dream said...

Well, my university is 3 hours from my parents house.. But I do have experience in going to India & Chile by myself for a couple of months.. so perhaps that counts as well. I would say.. It's OK to be scared. I was terrified. Realize all the great new experiences it's going to bring to you. Be nice to people. Do the things you love. And I'm sure you're gonna have loads of fun!


Fly Anyways.x said...

I love this!!! At 21 I already feel this way... Here's to growing and changing for the better! :)