Monday, December 12, 2011

Puppies, panic attacks and motherhood.

This morning I woke up to Penny crying very loud and very panicked. I bolted out of bed like you do when you wake up an hour late for work or a test and felt a small pang in my chest as though I had had a small heart attack. I scrambled out of bed and ran downstairs so fast that I'm amazed I didn't break my neck (is a sudden increase in coordination part of the Mother-Bear adrenaline rush?).

Somewhere within the 45 second time frame, she had stopped crying and the sudden silence was even more terrifying than the jut wrenching cries. I dropped to my knees and yanked open her crate, half expecting to see a freshly dead puppy and what did I see?

She was perfectly fine. Wagged her little tail and wobbled out of her crate and over to her food bowl.

I sat on the floor dumb-founded for a few seconds, trying to put my heart back in my chest. Then realized what had happened. She had taught herself that when she cried, I came running. Thus, when she wanted to get out of her crate at 5 AM, she needed to cry like a dog shaped banshee. I had inadvertently trained my dog to give me heart attacks.

It was in this moment I realized I am 100% not ready for children. And I have a deep admiration for every single mother out there. Seriously. I don't know how you do it. I think I would have a panic attack every time they scraped their knee and God forbid there were ever any broken bones. I feel the need to call my own mother and apologize for being such a sickly and accident prone child myself.

Lucky for me, I was snapped back out of my thought bubble by her peeing on the carpet right in front of me. So we went for a walk around the neighborhood while it was not only raining, but still dark. Potty training is going well. Thanks for asking.


Gentri said...

Aw! Hahaha! I know how training puppies goes. But it's so worth it! I'm sure children would be even more worth it. :)

waterlilygallery said...

Speaking as a mother we do have heart attacks every time our children are hurt in any way - either physically or emotionally. But its all worth it when they grow up to be wonderful, insightful, intelligent people.

And you weren't any more sickly or accident prone than any other child.

Anonymous said...

She is adorable... and looks like she uses it to her advantage! As difficult is that is with a puppy I still desperately want one again. lol

Best of luck with the potty training! It will be over before you know it :)

a cup of subtle tea

Amber said...

I did the same thing only I opted to just let my pup sleep in my bed because I could not deal with the constant crying. Its been three and a half years and he still sleeps in the bed.

skippysays said...

Hehe, my pup used to do the same thing but I stopped falling for it and have trained him out of it :)

Halley said...

Haha! Well you described it perfectly and by the sounds of it neither am I.